Triggers

I am going to write about triggers I have currently and how they are affecting me.

1.  I feel excluded.  I grew up in a house with the family of six. I use to do things with my brothers and parents all the time.  Now I have my own family in an apartment, but it is different, I am out in the living room and they are all in the bedrooms either on their phones or tvs.  They come out only to get something to eat.  They don't say "hi" or anything. When the second half goes somewhere anymore, he doesn't ask if I would like to go with him. My kids don't want to do anything with me anymore at all.  This leads me to my next trigger.
2. I feel ignored.  My kids only seem to talk to me only when they need me to do something for them or take them somewhere. Other than that I am just another home decor.  Since I sleep out in the living room, everyone else has doors.  They close them and I feel like it is a message to me to not talk to them or even visit them.  That's the message I get.  I sometimes stand in the hallway in front of the doors wondering why it is the way it is. This causing me to be affected by another feeling,
3. Feeling unloved.  When my immediate family members are in their rooms (remember I stay out in the living room) with their doors closed, I feel I am not worth for them to come out of their rooms to spend a second with me.  I have become irrelevant to them, non existent and like I mentioned ignored.  
4. I feel trapped.  Living in an apartment with people whom you'd think would treat you like family but don't, I feel like I am in a prison.  I may be creating this myself but I feel as though I am with in walls that were built within me.  How do I plan to escape the walls? I have plans. They will take the future to continue to break down the walls but soon one day I will be free of all of this.
5 Lack of passion on all members of the family.  There are no outings, discussions on future plans, and most of all finance is of no relevance.
6. I feel uncared for. I may also have built this in my brain that another person needs to take care of me, but it does come hand in hand of family members to watch out for each other and care for one another.  I do try to practice self care but there is also a stimulant that everyone needs from another who is living with them under the same roof.  I am lacking that sort of stimulation and it can scare in the future I feel.

These are the triggers I currently sustain and soon will be evaluating myself in the near future to correct and become stronger.
I have found that I have more work to do to end the turmoil.

Update yet to come...