Without the help of social media, how many people have you past in your path. My point is, how many actual people are actually making a difference in your life, without posts of what they made for dinner or trips they have taken or inspirational memes.
I thought back and found no one. Not a single person I know I have crossed paths in the past oh, say, 10 years. So, what does that tell me? How alone I am? No, just that I am a introvert and that maybe I need to start thinking of getting out more. Meet more people in groups or something.
What got me start thinking about this, I was scrolling through Facebook and found a lot of people that I use to cross paths with. They have lives! Some are even living out of the country with Master or Phd. degrees married with smiling babies. Babies...at the late ages of 35 and 40 now. I have teenagers and have been married for 16 years, and yet I am bored, lost and a no one. Ok, so I am not a no one per say, I am just not as active? I don't initiate or haven't in the past to get to where I need to be. So, where do I start now?
The reason I ask this is because lately, I feel I am in a prison, locked down marriage with no money, job or experience to get out. My life has become my prison. To dig a hole with what I don't have seems impossible. Nothing is impossible, I have my hands to dig with. Right? Work with what God gave you? I don't believe in God, so maybe I have to stay literal and work with what I do have...my brain. Mind over matter they say, though have they ever had to actually work with my mind? Fear, doubt, and a huge wall I have built in the late 10 years stands before me. Finding away to tear it down seems next to impossible. But who's to say that it needs to be torn down. Why not climb over it and sit on top, see as far as the eyes can see. Possibilities are possible. Dreams can come true no matter how much you plan for them, sometimes, you just have to jump. Something has to break in the fall. Hopefully it will be the fear and doubt.
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